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pepperpot
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 8:10 am Post subject: Captive |
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...
Day 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
Day 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
Day 762 - Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep deprivation, incessant pleas for food at all hours of the night.
Day 767 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little boy I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.
Day 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture.This time, however, it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid? My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
Day 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
Day 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and may be snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue, something akin to mole speak, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal, room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
stay tune for more 
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ruthsollid
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 10:07 am Post subject: |
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Samantha,
That was HILARIOUS!! I was  !! It is just like a cat to think about dogs like that! When I read that part, my laughter was uncontrollable! I'm crying with laughter! That's a good one for Sheila!
Thanks for making my day! 
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pepperpot
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 4:29 pm Post subject: |
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Glad you liked it... I like it too... I'm hoping to find more of it... let see
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wwe9112
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 4:40 pm Post subject: |
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Can someone explain this to me? I'm lost.
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ruthsollid
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 6:40 pm Post subject: |
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wwe,
It's not a person that is "captive" it's a cat that THINKS that he is! Reread it with the cat in mind.
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fay47
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 7:25 pm Post subject: |
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Very funny,
Fay
PS. Now if you can find one written from a dogs point of view  |
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pepperpot
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 9:54 pm Post subject: |
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| fay47 wrote: |
| PS. Now if you can find one written from a dogs point of view |
Good point Fay... Lets see... I too would like to know this one 
I particularly like Day 768... as I was the one in the Shower with the cat 
I used the shower as it was easier to "pin" him down than using the tub, but man... a cat bath is a torture for both sides - lol
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Repa
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| Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 11:44 pm Post subject: |
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Well, Sam, I didn't know you were talking about your cat, or even a cat for that matter. How funny! I didn't know you could be so witty! Thought this was something you had found somewhere and were repeating it to us. Can't wait to hear more!
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Repa
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Rike
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| Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 2:23 am Post subject: |
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pepperpot
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| Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 10:01 pm Post subject: |
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| Repa wrote: |
| Well, Sam, I didn't know you were talking about your cat, or even a cat for that matter. How funny! I didn't know you could be so witty! Thought this was something you had found somewhere and were repeating it to us. Can't wait to hear more! |
Lol... Repa that is not mine... I'm sorry  - Though one can say that this girl may have a few things up her sleeves... wit is not one of them 
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Repa
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| Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 10:31 pm Post subject: |
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Sam, I'm not following you. First you said this:
| pepperpot wrote: |
I particularly like Day 768... as I was the one in the Shower with the cat
I used the shower as it was easier to "pin" him down than using the tub, but man... a cat bath is a torture for both sides - lol |
and then you said this:
| pepperpot wrote: |
| Lol... Repa that is not mine... I'm sorry - Though one can say that this girl may have a few things up her sleeves... wit is not one of them |
So if "Captive" is not about a cat in your house and you interpreting the cat's thoughts and giving it a bath, what is it about? I think anyone who can make up funny stuff like that about what a cat in the house is thinking is pretty witty in my book!  I used to give my Nikki (a Norwegain Elkhound) a bath in the shower - it was easier on both of us. She wasn't crazy about it, but had perfect manners and always did what she was told.
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Repa
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pepperpot
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| Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 10:47 pm Post subject: |
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Repa... honestly... I did not compose that essay - tho yes... it is about "A" cat... I got it from a newsletter I signup many moons ago
In another post of mine I also said
| pepperpot wrote: |
| Glad you liked it... I like it too... I'm hoping to find more of it... let see |
Then I proceeded to say that
| Quote: |
I particularly like Day 768... as I was the one in the Shower with the cat
I used the shower as it was easier to "pin" him down than using the tub, but man... a cat bath is a torture for both sides - lol |
And just like you, I can relate to Day 768 as I use to bathed my cat
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Repa
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| Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 8:54 am Post subject: |
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Oh, ok, then I misunderstood. Old people get confused! Sounded like you were saying that it was you with the cat in the shower on day 768, so I assumed you were making up all the other days too. I'll be careful about "accusing" you of being "witty" in the future!
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Repa
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pepperpot
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| Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 4:36 pm Post subject: |
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| Repa wrote: |
| Oh, ok, then I misunderstood. Old people get confused! Sounded like you were saying that it was you with the cat in the shower on day 768, so I assumed you were making up all the other days too. I'll be careful about "accusing" you of being "witty" in the future! |
A-ja... very funny 
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Sheila
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| Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 7:25 pm Post subject: |
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Repa,
We sure do get confused...Me more than most...
Sam...nice cat story...Wish I could put mine in the tub...Ouch! Have tried that before ...
LOL...
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