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[quote="BlackVelvetRose"]WOW!!![/quote]
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<table border="0" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1" width="100%" class="forumline"> <tr> <th class="thCornerL" width="22%" height="26">Author</th> <th class="thCornerR">Message</th> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class=""><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>BlackVelvetRose</b></span></td> <td class="" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="templates/ezWind/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2009 9:39 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="genmed">WOW!!!</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="templates/ezWind/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class=""><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>Jay</b></span></td> <td class="" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="templates/ezWind/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 9:11 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: </span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="genmed">Your writing is wonderful! Hope to see more from you soon!</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="templates/ezWind/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class=""><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>citricpepper</b></span></td> <td class="" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="templates/ezWind/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 6:44 pm<span class="gen"> </span> Post subject: Possibilities -slash- Frank/Gerard one-shot</span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="genmed"><span style="font-weight: bold">Title:</span> Possibilities <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Author:</span> citricpepper <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Pairing: </span>Frank/Jamia, Frank/Gerard (kind of) <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Rating:</span> PG/T <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Genre: </span>Angst/Romance <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">POV:</span> Third, Frank-Centric <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Summary: </span><span style="font-style: italic">"We kinda need to talk. Today," She hurried to say, "Because tomorrow I won't have the guts to do it."</span><span style="font-weight: bold">Disclaimer:</span> They only feel each other up on stage; the rest is all on my imagination account <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Author Notes:</span> Slightly based on the events of Projekt Revolution <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Warnings:</span> Swearing, a little angst, Jamia <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Dedications:</span> My beta Jessy, gee4president.livejournal.com <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /><span style="font-weight: bold">Possibilities</span> <br /> <br /> <br />Frank feels like every bone inside his body has been smashed by a truck ten times. He's sore <span style="font-style: italic">everywhere</span>, not to mention he sweated so much on that one night that anyone could probably smell him from a mile away and it's not funny. It's been a long time since they had a summer this hot; thermometers seem to be about to blow up at any moment. <br /> <br />All the he wants is to have a good, long shower until he is clean and smelling good again and crash into bed to cuddle with his probably already asleep sweet fiancée, and drift off to a slumber of peace. <br /> <br />But when he opens the hotel bedroom door, he thinks that he might have to change his plans; his cute fiancée isn't as asleep on the bed as he thought she would be; she is sitting on a small couch, chewing on her nails and looking straight at Frank. <br /> <br />"Is something wrong baby? I thought you said you were tired, and I took pretty long at the meetings…" <br /> <br />"We kinda need to talk. Today," She hurried to say, "Because tomorrow I won't have the guts to do it." Frank blinked. "Go have your shower, and we'll talk okay?" <br /> <br />"No, it's okay, let's talk now. You're worrying me. What's wrong, sweetheart?" <br /> <br />"You sure you don't wanna take your shower first?" Jamia asks, looking at the floor. <br /> <br />"Mia, what's up?" The man asks, closing the door behind him and sitting next to his fiancée. She just shrugs. <br /> <br />"You had a busy night on the gig, huh?" She smiles faintly. He smiles back. <br /> <br />"Yeah, it was awesome, wasn't it? It just keeps getting better. Amazing." She nods and bites her lip. After a deep sigh she turns to face him, her hazel eyes carry a hint he can't quite detect. <br /> <br />"You're really trading me for him, huh?" She bites her lip again. Frank stares at her genuinely confused. <br /> <br />"What??" <br /> <br />"Frankie..." She lets out a sigh. "It's not like you're being very good at hiding it lately. To tell the truth, you never were." <br /> <br />"You're talking about Gerard?" He asks in disbelief. <br /> <br />"Yes Frank, I am talking about Gerard." <br /> <br />"Mia, c'mon… I know it has been a little too much lately. Is it making you uncomfortable?" <br /> <br />"Do you honestly think I'm that narrow-minded? I wish it was that simple." She lets out a shaky breath before saying in a rush, her eyes lighter than usual. <br /> <br /> <br />"What? My god baby, what are you talking about? You think I want something more from Gerard? It's just stage act, sweetheart. Rush of emotions and adrenaline. We're only kidding." She giggles sadly. <br /> <br />"Who are you trying to convince, me or you? You know it's more than that, it always was… In fact, I should have seen it coming…" <br /> <br />"Jamia, baby, don't be stupid. I love you, okay? I've got your name tattooed on my fucking chest! Gerard is just my best friend, and we do some stuff on stage but you said it didn't bother you!" <br /> <br />"It's not the kisses or the touches, Frankie!" <br /> <br />"Then what is it?" She stares at him wide-eyed before shaking her head. <br /> <br />"I suppose you don't notice. But everybody does, and I do too, from the very moment I met him. When he is around, Frankie, your eyes, they sparkle. You stare at him all the time, it's like the whole fucking world doesn't exist. You get that adoring look on your face and you don't listen to anybody else. I remember when I first met him, when you brought me to meet the band. When he entered the room you let go of my hand, and only half of your attention was with me. It never changed. It's still the same, and you don't even notice it." Frank smiles pitifully. <br /> <br />"Jamia, don't be silly, you have no reason to be jealous. He is a very charismatic person, you know that. I also admire him and his talent with all my heart, and you know that too. C'mon baby, what's the problem… I'll ask him to lay off a little, okay? It's been really all too much lately. I guess it's his own way of--" <br /> <br />"Don't do that, because it's not what you want. Why are you doing this to yourself? And me? And Gerard? I don't understand what's wrong, Frankie, I really don't. Stop pretending." <br /> <br />"Jamia, you're being paranoid. What are you trying to say?" <br /> <br />"I'm saying you are in love with Gerard Way, Frank. C'mon, it's so fucking obvious, I'm sure you know it too!" Frank laughs a little. <br /> <br /> <br />"Okay, I think it's better we talk tomorrow. You're obviously not thinking straight right now." She gives him a hurt glance. "What? I don't understand any of this Jamia, I swear to fucking god! I'm your fiancé, we are getting married next year, and I've been with you for over ten years now. What else do I need to do to prove you that I love you?" <br /> <br />"I do believe you love me… Just not in the way you think." She whispers. <br /> <br />"Have you been reading one of those fan fics?" <br /> <br />"Just… Listen okay? I'm pretty sure you know all of that, but I guess I can play this game if you want. I knew it all the time. It was all there, written all over your face. You had so much affection and care going on for him, it was overwhelming. I recognized your feelings but I thought it was okay. That you loved him but loved me in a different way, and that wouldn't be a problem. You got just so concerned about everything that was related to him… When he was depressed, suicidal and all… When somebody said something about him in the room I could feel your heart beating faster when we were hugging. It hurt a little; but I thought it would be okay. I fell in love with you so deeply, Frank, fuck, you don't have any idea. I still am, even more perhaps, in love with you. Maybe that's why it took me so long to do this…" She sighs deeply before continuing. "It was all okay, the kisses on stage, the touches, everything. It was cute; it was just you guys mocking around and everything. But you weren't okay with it, were you? Like, what happened in the Paramour mansion between you two? It must have been something really serious, because when you two had finished the album, you were barely speaking. Remember when you said, that you had faced inner demons there? That you were thinking about quitting the band? It was you two, I could see it. But I didn't say anything. I never said anything about it until now because I wasn't brave enough to do it, but it has to stop. It has come way too far already. I remember when you finished the album you and me… We were great. You fucking proposed to me! I thought… I was selfish enough to be happy about it. Things were great between you and me and you even tattooed my name. It felt perfect you know? Even though deep down there you were only acting like that out of desperation because you and Gerard were barely speaking. It was terrible on your birthday, huh? Gerard treated you on stage really coldly and I bet you were expecting for you to resolve your issues on that day. After the gig, at the party…You tried to cheer up but you were sad; I could tell. It was like you and him couldn't fix things. You had abandoned the tour a whole lot of fucking times, claiming to be sick to the fans when you told me it was because you couldn't stand the way things were with the band. But you were sick Frankie, I could tell. You didn't eat right, you didn't smile right, you became a ghost. Inside I was praying for you to make things okay, and finally you did." <br /> <br />"Jamia…" <br /> <br />"Lemme finish! When you and him were okay again and you started to tour normally, you were back to that person I love so much. You were back to being yourself. Then it hit me; it wasn't me that brought that wonderful personality up; it was him. All him. I guess what happened on Paramour was really serious, because it affected him a lot too. Even more than it had affected you, I think." <br /> <br />"All of that doesn't mean that--" <br /> <br />"It does, Frankie, it does! You fucking love him! And I was so selfish to accept this with my mouth shut because I love you way too much. I love you with my heart and it's fucking shattering me to pieces inside to do what I'm doing now, but it has to be done. When you two were back to being friends… it hurt him even more, didn't it? Oh god, I can see in his eyes, the way he looks at you, the way he looks at me. I can see how he loves to be on stage with you because there he can do whatever he wants. But sometimes he pushes you away, doesn't he? I know why, and you do too. He wants more from you; and you don't want to give him. He feels used. I guess that's why he wanted to be normal, he wanted to be with someone else too. My god, look how miserable you've made him, Frankie! He felt like he had to pick the first girl that popped into his head and put a fucking ring on her finger to prove to you that he could be your equal! And look at what a mess he has done by doing that. He was so fucking desperate he didn't even consider looking for someone that would fit him better, he chose Eliza fucking Cuts. And you felt terrible, didn't you? It was all so forced, even I cringed. He was falling down fast, trying to find something that could make sense in his life other then you. And then they broke up and he is just even more lost! You've put him into so much unnecessary pain, because you know his feelings are returned." <br /> <br />"Gerard didn't get engaged because he liked me, Jamia. What you’re saying doesn’t even make any sense!" She lets out a frustrated growl. <br /> <br />"My god, Frank, stop it! Make things easier for me! Do you think it's nice to say all those things to you now? It's not, so stop acting like I'm lying!" She inhales deeply to focus. "At that point, I had already seen that you two belong together. My god, and it took me fucking long enough. You were both falling into pieces away from each other and it was so stupid and stubborn. But I couldn't just come… And break up with you, you know? It was more than I could take. I was so pathetic, but I love you so fucking much… So I waited around. Waited for the day you'd come and break with me, and finally be happy with the one you truly loved, but you didn't! And instead, things have just gotten worse and worse; you said you were thinking about doing the same Mikey did when we got married. Get a break from the band. I knew why you were thinking about that; you could never focus on me as a wife with Gerard around. You were just making one more mistake, and then… Projekt Revolution and things… Exploded. All of those gigs, Frankie… You just can't take being away from him anymore, can you? There are sparkles between you guys. And kisses, and touches and moans… And it's all because you're both frustrated and miserable. I don't understand it! It's not like you're a homophobic, it's not like it is bad for the band's image, it's not like the guys don't support you. Why can't you just be with him?" Frank is speechless. <br /> <br />"Because I love <span style="font-style: italic">you</span>…" He whispers weak when his voice returns. <br /> <br />"And you don't love him?" She asks sarcastically, but her eyes are bright with tears. <br /> <br />"I uh… Is it possible to love two people at the same time?" She smiles sadly. <br /> <br />"You know it's not. At least not in the same way. It breaks my heart to do what I'm doing but I can't pretend I'm not seeing it anymore. Getting married will only complicate things even more. Please, Frankie. Be reasonable. You'll only get the three of us more hurt." <br /> <br />"I ah… I don't know what to say. I love you, I really do. I never meant to hurt you and I don't wanna hurt you now. We've been together for so long… I've deprived you from a lot of opportunities… It's so unfair to just like… end now." <br /> <br />"Frank, for Christ's sake! Living a fake won't make it any better. Please, just follow your heart. I'm gonna leave you and it costs my fucking core to do it, so make it worth it. Go and stop Gerard's pain for once and for all… I'm sure he'll make you so happy, honey… Much more than I do." She states, running the back of her hand on one of Frank's cheeks. <br /> <br />"I don't wanna lose you." <br /> <br />"You won't. As a friend. I'll always be a friend, no matter what. Thank you, for everything, really. You made me so happy… Even if you didn't like me the way you liked him, still it was enough for me to feel on the top of the world." <br /> <br />"You too… I love you so much. You're beautiful and…I'm gonna miss you lots." <br /> <br />"I know." She whispers, and finally some hot glossy tears spill from her pretty hazel eyes. She lets out another sigh and, trembling, gets the silver ring out of her finger. It's difficult because it's tight on her skin but she manages to do it. Then she grabs one of her now former fiancée and presses the ring against his damp palm, after pressing a kiss to the object. "I love you." She whispers, in between a kiss upon his tear-stained cheek. But suddenly, he grabs the sides of her face and forces her into an open-mouth kiss, long and intense. "Thanks." She says smiling after they break apart. "I had my things transferred to another room. I'll stay for the night and tomorrow I'll go home. When, you and Gerard, umm, work things out, we see what we'll do about the house and stuff, okay?" Frank nods still in awe and feeling very scared of everything that's happening. "Now… What are you waiting for? Go find him." <br /> <br />*** <br /> <br />Frank had stayed under the warm shower spray for over an hour, trying to process everything that had happened and trying to wash away his guilt for hurting Jamia the way he did. <br /> <br />He's still in awe as he walks on the hallway, but finally, things are starting to sink in. It's odd and joyful and very overwhelming, and his heart is already pounding as he stops on Gerard's door. The tiredness and soreness apparently had all faded away. <br /> <br />He presses the card he asked for on the reception to the slot and feeling his pulse lumping inside his very throat. <br /> <br />And Gerard is there, bent over the window, in his pajamas, looking at the city below his eyes and lazily blowing cigarette smoke into the air before sucking on his Marlboro for some more; a faint summer breeze making some of his locks wave gracefully. <br /> <br />What a coquettish insomniac he is. <br /> <br />A few heartstrings twirl around inside Frank's chest; a mix of relief and devotion, and fear. <br /> <br />"Gee…?" <br /> <br /> <br /><span style="font-style: italic"> <br />the end~</span> <br /> <br /><span style="color: indigo">comments, please? <img src="images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif" alt="Very Happy" border="0" /></span> <br /> <br /><span style="font-size: 9px; line-height: normal">Verified 1/14/08 Jay</span></span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="templates/ezWind/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> </table>
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